God is a refuge for marriages

Every marriage faces its storms. Yes, even the best covenants have situations to arise that challenge their foundation and perhaps, make the couple question their ability to survive it all. Whether that test is related to finances, health, family interference, or broken promises; every couple has been there. In fact, some of the strongest Christian marriages are made up of those who have face problems that could have — and perhaps should have — destroyed them; yet, they survived. How? Because they took refuge.

When we consider a place to reside or to live, we think of a house or some type of structure. We don’t live in heaven. We live here on earth in a shattered world crowded with hurting people. We are coping with natural disasters, job loss, illness, broken relationships, death of loved ones; the list goes on. We only need to read, watch or listen to any trace of information, and the hardships of this world can overwhelm us. Even our homes cannot protect us from all the chaos. Dissatisfaction, problems and hurt find their way into our lives, wherever our earthly locale is.

We live in a fallen and broken world. But thank God that while we may live here, we have a refuge wherever we are and regardless of what we are facing.

Married couples, when tempted to escape the stresses of life, the Scripture tell us to hide ourselves in God. Only God can offer true refuge from life’s dangers and the misery of our sin. As we experience the stresses of this world, we trust that His ways are higher than our ways, and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts (Isaiah 55:8-9). We find refuge as we trust in His power, authority and sovereignty. This means we place our faith over our feelings as God is in control of each situation and struggle that we face.

Whether our married lives have been met with multiple pain points, or we are just now experiencing our first sense of anguish, God is faithful to restore. On that, we can rely.

When the Bible illustrates God as our refuge, it is saying that God is our comfort zone, our strong tower, our safe place when we need protection from something. Knowing God as our refuge empowers us to freely trust Him more. When we have a personal relationship with God, we need not panic about situations or people who attempt to threaten the well-being of our covenant. There is no situation we will ever face that is out of God’s control, so the best place to be, always, is right with Him.

“The name of the LORD is a fortified tower; the righteous run to it and are safe” (Proverbs 18:10).

A question that may rise in the minds of every husband and wife it, “How do I make God my refuge?” It’s easy to imagine a physical refuge protecting us from levels of danger, but how can we make God — whom we can’t see — the refuge for our marriage?

“My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in him always, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge” (Psalm 62:7–8).

An easy way to make God the refuge for our marriage is to merely ask Him to be. David said, “Pour out your hearts to him.” He could advise that on personal experience; that’s what David did all the time. He poured out his heart to God about what was going on in his life and asked God to intercede on his behalf. When we turn to God for help or protection, we begin to know Him as our refuge. God is our refuge. However, that does not mean we’ll never find ourselves in challenging or risky situations.

Jesus led the disciples into a boat, knowing full well that a ferocious storm was looming. The disciples were frightened, but Jesus, their refuge, calmed the storm (Matthew 8:23–27). When we are in God’s will, husbands and wives can face even the most aggressive situations with faith, because God is with us. No matter what our circumstance, the safest place to be is always in the center of God’s will. He promises to be our refuge.

“‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.’ So, we say with confidence, ‘The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?’” (Hebrews 13:5–6).

Drs. Michael & Kendra Holmes are the senior pastors of Deliverance Revival Church in Byron, Ga., the founders of Royalty Relationship Coaching, LLC, the authors of the 31-day devotional, “Cross-Fire: Igniting Passionate, Purposeful, and Powerful Relationships” and guest hosts of the former television talk show, “The Marriage Circle Connection.” W.A.R. is an acronym for “We Are Royalty,” ™ the official slogan of Royalty Relationship Coaching, LLC. Visit the website at www.RoyaltyRelationshipCoaching.com.

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