Baby, it’s cold outside

As we look at the world around us, we see so much disruption and disorder. As soon as one horror ends, another begins. As Christians, none of it should really take us by surprise. Among a long list of shameful occurrences that the Bible gives us in Matthew 24 when speaking of what we can expect as the end of the world draws nearer, Jesus says in verse 12, “And because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold.”

Iniquity is another word for “evil” or “sin,” and our world has never been so evil and sinful as it is today. Even those who name the name of Christ have fallen victim. Things that used to disgust Christians (because they go against the Word of God) are now not only accepted, but embraced. There seem to be no boundaries, and the line that used to define the saints from the sinners has now all but totally faded.

We are all beginning to look alike, think alike, and worst of all, live alike. We now exist in a “do what makes you happy” society, and the things that make us happy are no longer the things that please our heavenly Father. We are a nation who has forgotten God, and because of that, hatred and violence is running ramped. The love of many has waxed cold.

This coldness of love can be seen all around us and in almost every area of our daily interactions. The enemy, in his subtle craftiness, crept in little by little, and because many Christians became lax and fell asleep on the job, the devil was allowed space to rise up in a way that never would have happened if we, on a broad scale, had been obedient to God’s Word, which tells us to “Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour” (1 Peter 5:8).

So now, more than ever, the coldness of the world outside has begun waxing into the family unit. In the area in which we reside, the year 2020 started off with children murdering their parents. A son stabbed to death both his mother and stepfather. A few weeks later, a daughter murdered her stepmother and her stepmother’s unborn baby. And in another case, a mother and father had to flee from their home in order to escape being slain by their violent son.

Killings within families are nothing new. Even within the first family, parented by Adam and Eve, we find the murder of Abel at the hands of his brother Cain. But while this iced-over love is not a novel occurrence, what we are seeing in today’s society is a new level of coldness. The news headlines are saturated with it.

If nowhere else, the one place that should be a safe haven is inside the home. Love at its finest and warmest should be found there. Regardless of what we face on our jobs or in any other aspects of daily life, when we get home, we should be met by love, peace, protection and joy. This is especially true in marriage.

Husbands and wives—whether they have minor children or are empty nesters—play such a key role in the warmth and safety of a home. Matthew 7:24-25 tells us that a wise man builds his house upon a rock (a solid foundation), so that even when the hard rains, high floods and harsh winds (i.e. adversities that happen on the outside) come, the house will not fall. In Proverbs 14:1 (AMP), we are told that, “The wise woman builds her house [on a foundation of godly precepts, and her household thrives], but the foolish one [who lacks spiritual insight] tears it down with her own hands [by ignoring godly principles].”

Based on the Word of God, the difference between whether our households are peaceful or chaotic is largely based on whether we (husbands and wives) are wise or foolish. It’s as simple, yet as complicated as that. Nobody likes to be called foolish (stupid, silly, idiotic), but if we don’t build a peaceful home on the foundation of Jesus Christ, that’s exactly how God defines us.

Wife, can your husband be totally vulnerable with you? Can he show you his hurt, his weaknesses… even his fears and know without a doubt that his anguishes won’t be repeated to your circle of friends? Titus 2:3 (AMP) indicates that wives should “be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips…” Verse 5 adds that wives should be “sensible, pure, makers of a home [where God is honored], good-natured, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.”

Husband, can your wife depend on you to support her? Can she come to you with her hurts and concerns and know that she can communicate with you without you becoming quarrelsome with her? Can she count on you, as the head of household, for wise counsel that is rooted in the Word of God? The book of Titus does not leave out the men. In chapter 2 and verse 2, we are told that men are to be “temperate, dignified, sensible, sound in faith, in love, in steadfastness [Christlike in character].” Verse 5 adds that men should also be “self-controlled and to behave wisely [taking life seriously].”

Every wife should find peace and safety wrapped in the arms of her husband, regardless of what she’s faced before she comes home to him. Likewise, every husband should find the same solace lying in the lap of his wife, despite the cruel world that he might have faced in the hours before arriving home. There is absolutely nothing like having a loving, harmonious, Christ-centered marriage!

The world outside is cold, and unfortunately, we can’t avoid mingling there. Through our careers, educational pursuits, daily travel and other appointments, life will force us to interact with the outside world and deal with the lack of love that comes with it. But when spouses come together at the end of the day, there should be no iciness. There should be love and unity. There should be kindness, support and understanding. There should be warmth.

There is an old song that says, “What the world needs now is love, sweet love. It’s the only thing that there’s just too little of…” When we look at our world, we fully agree with this sentiment. In 1 John 4:7-8, we read, “Beloved, let us love one another; for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. He that loveth not knoweth not God; for GOD IS LOVE.” So when we say what the world needs now is love, what we’re actually saying is what the world needs now is GOD.

“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love” (1 Corinthians 13:13).

Drs. Michael & Kendra Holmes are the senior pastors of Deliverance Revival Church in Warner Robins, the founders of Royalty Relationship Coaching, LLC, and the authors of the devotional, “Cross-Fire: Igniting Passionate, Purposeful, and Powerful Relationships.” W.A.R. is an acronym for “We Are Royalty,” the official slogan of Royalty Relationship Coaching, LLC. Visit the website at www.RoyaltyRelationshipCoaching.com.

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