Abuse and morality

We need to have a national conversation about morality.  The #MeToo movement and the Larry Vassar molestation horror story have exposed (yet, again) a hidden moral wasteland infecting our society.  We are headed into some pretty dangerous territory, if we turn our backs on this reality.

We need to begin by coming to grips with the reality that child molesters and wife barterers don’t walk around with their moral weakness tatooed on their foreheads.  Child molesters do not advertise their deviancy ahead of destroying the lives of our children and teenagers.  They burrow into different segments of our society in roles presenting them as wide a pool of potential victims as possible.  They hide in plain sight as our religious leaders, educators, pediatricians, trainers, Boy Scout leaders.  The very ease they have with children is the poison they use to lure their victims into a circle of trust.

Larry Vassar was a Michigan State University physician who provided team services in gymnastics and women’s crew teams.  He was our national gymnastic team’s physician in four (4) separate Olympics.  He left 125 women scarred for life by his evil, including two (2) of your most accomplished women gymnasts, Aly Raisman and Gabby Douglas.  His grotesque pattern of sexual abuse has brought down the MSU President and the scandal still envelopes the University in its putrid stank.

Penn State University and the hallowed Joe (“Joe Pa”) Paterno will never be the same because of Jerry Sandusky being permitted to ramble through a field of male of youths provided by his “Second Mile” non-profit organization for at-risk young men.  Hailed as a great man selflessly molding the future for children from broken backgrounds, he was secretly destroying the trust of so many – convicted of 45 counts of child molestation.

Thanks to a burst of energy from courageous women exposing powerful men, how the high and mighty have fallen.  Harvey Weinstein, Bill Cosby, Steve Wynn, Travis Kalanick, there is a tawdry roll call of sociopaths which keeps growing.  Roy Moore lost a Senate election tailor made for a conservative Republican.  At Uber, 20 people were fired because of Susan Fowler’s willingness to publicly condemn the culture of sexual harassment in which she had to toil.

But, not all of them suffered for their predation and the public’s .  Bill Clinton received a “pass,” despite being impeached by the House, because women of a different generation stood by him.  Donald Trump was elected President, despite 19 women being brave enough to publicly accuse him for being a creep (and a videotape and public statements consistent with their accounts).  In some respects, the devil’s bargain Hillary Clinton made with Bill Clinton, begat President Trump and felled her dream of becoming first woman president.  We are living in a swirling evolution from a world of male privilege into a “new normal” in which misogyny is no longer tolerated.

It is in this “new normal” we must test the White House’s reaction to the tales of abuse told by Rob Porter’s ex-wives, Colbie Holderness (his 1st wife) and Jennifer Willoughby (the 2nd).  Ms. Holderness has stepped forward to tell of the approximately 2 years abuse she suffered, starting from their honeymoon and leading up to a trip to Florence, in which she was punched – and had the pictures to prove it.  She divorced Mr. Porter because of the repeated abuse.  Ms. Willoughby’s suffering also started on the honeymoon and a year later she had obtained a domestic restraining order because of a violent episode.  They were divorced.

There is apparently a third (anonymous) woman out there who dated Mr. Porter in the Spring of 2016 who has refused to step out of the shadows.  Yet, she has reached out to Ms. Holderness and Ms. Willoughby seeking some affirmation that what she endured was not a mirage.  At this point, her story remains a shadow.

The Trump Administration has not done itself any favors in how it reacted to what it knew of Mr. Porter.  We do not know (and may never) exactly what was known by whom and when.  Yet, when we learned of Mr. Porter’s history, President Trump’s reaction was to tweet about how “lives are being shattered and destroyed by a mere allegation . . . . There is no recovery for someone falsely accused.”  He went on to muse how “Due Process” was missing.  It is not clear if this tweet was directly a condemnation to what had just happened in his White House, but the veiled reference is about what has been wrong in our country for quite some time.

There is no “due process” to the survivors of a Larry Nassar or Jerry Strickland.  Maybe they saw a beast finally imprisoned, but there is no remedy for the pain seared in their souls.  There is no justice for the women stepped on by the Weinsteins, Wynns, and Kalanicks, on their rise to wealth and power.  And, the women preyed upon by Bill Cosby and his drug cocktail probably sleep no better today knowing he has been exposed as a pervert.

The lives that are shattered are not those of the accused, it is those having to silently endure the pain of violation, frozen by the fear that the truth of an accusation would be swatted away.  Yes, it is true that some are falsely accused.  The Duke Lacrosse Team comes to mind as a perfect example.  Yet, monsters have pretty faces with stellar resumes, we need to stop fooling ourselves.  It’s passed time we stopped assuming that protestations of innocence from the powerful and successful are to be reflexively believed.  Due process wears more than one face and abusers cannot hide any longer.

Warner Robins attorney Jim Rockefeller is the former Chief Assistant District Attorney for Houston County, and a former Assistant State Attorney in Miami.  Owner of Rockefeller Law Center, Jim has been in private practice since 2000. E-mail your comments or confidential legal questions to ajr@rockefellerlawcenter.com

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