Spiritual warfare against marriage

When we refer to Scripture and read Adam and Eve’s story, it starts out like a fairytale. First, God designs a man, and then, after seeing him alone, He fashions a life mate for him. Eve was created while Adam slept. God formed her from Adam’s rib, and he awakens to find a woman who is literally flesh of his flesh and bone of his bone. It was intended to remain as perfect as it began. Together, Adam and Eve lived in a beautiful garden, totally unbothered… until evil slithered in.

Funny thing is—the enemy would never have been able to mess up their paradise if Adam and Eve had just been obedient to God. Disobedience creates gaps in our spiritual buildings, which gives evil spirits access to our lives and enables them to set up a base of operation in us.

It’s important that we examine and reveal these access points for two reasons. First, to show ways in which we may have given access to a spirit in our past so that we can oust the unwanted trespasser and close the door once and for all. Secondly, to emphasize areas to circumvent so that we don’t give the enemy access to our life in the first place.

Ephesians 4:27 (KJV) reads: “Neither give place to the devil.” The word, place, in the Greek, means topos (top’-os) a spot, i.e., location (as a position, home, tract, etc.); figuratively, condition, opportunity.

First, let’s be clear about one thing, the devil is very real and so is his objective to steal, kill and destroy all that is godly. This includes marriage covenants that are devoted to God. In the Bible, Jesus speaks about spiritual warfare. He tells us that this world is full of it because of the identity of its master (satan).

Spiritual warfare in marriage can be recognized by unrighteous anger. In Ephesians 4:26, Paul made it very clear that it is all right to be angry as long as we avoid sin. It is through the unrighteous (sinful) anger that married couples begin to entertain unholy thoughts, words and actions. Something that shouldn’t be a big deal suddenly turns into a huge explosion. Not only that, but it also starts to pour over into other areas. This is the manipulation of the enemy to drive a wedge between husbands and wives.

Spiritual warfare isn’t something we discuss too often in the context of marriage. According to Scripture, “our battle is not simply against flesh and blood…but against the powers of this dark world…and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realm” (Ephesians 6:12). The fights we face in our lives and in our relationships are often more “unseen” than we realize.

A home that invites the kingdom and culture of heaven into it will be distinguished by the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness and self-control. And if the kingdom of darkness has an opening, his motive is destruction.

God’s original design for marriages is that it reflects Christ’s love for His bride, the church. That’s why it is important to identify spiritual warfare within a marriage. Compare marriage, for a moment, to a chair. If any leg is absent, the chair becomes unbalanced and will easily topple under the slightest weight. With Christ as a foundation, we are balanced, sturdy and able to withstand.

Spiritual warfare presents itself in every relationship, whether it is between a husband and wife, a parent and child, friends, or even between us and God. When we marry, we become one with our spouse; therefore, any spiritual “baggage” we have is added to them and creates an unnecessary complex set of spiritual patterns and problems.

This is why it is always best that individuals identify these issues and seek healing from them before they marry. Otherwise, when they enter a covenant relationship, they force their unsuspecting spouse under the pressure of those “demons” as well. Though we may be unaware of these “monsters” who have come to trouble us and set us up for opposition, they are real, and they are there, and they set up obstacles between the husband and the wife in hopes of creating division and destruction.

Married friends, the only way to find total victory over spiritual warfare is with God leading the way. Get clinical therapy, yes. Get spiritual counsel, yes. Get relationship coaching, yes. But in all your getting… get God!

Drs. Michael & Kendra Holmes are the pastors of Deliverance Revival Church in Warner Robins, Ga., the founders of Royalty Relationship Coaching, LLC, the authors of the 31-day devotional, “Cross-Fire: Igniting Passionate, Purposeful, and Powerful Relationships” and the founders of the faith-based newspaper, The Royal Trumpet. W.A.R. is an acronym for “We Are Royalty,” ™ the official slogan of Royalty Relationship Coaching, LLC. Visit the website at www.RoyaltyRelationshipCoaching.com.

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