How marriage reflects the gospel

As a husband and wife, you probably began your marriage with revealed hope and enthusiasm—much like you did as a bride and groom standing at the altar repeating vows. There is nothing wrong with that. As a matter of fact, you shouldn’t desire to have it any other way. As a single individual waiting on God to send a mate, one should never allow anyone to persuade them that their standards are too high. Don’t ever be convinced that you’re still unmarried because your expectations—specifically those regarding a man or woman’s dedication to God—are unreasonable.

A God-ordained marriage is worth the wait. Once He has brought you together, your mandate is to make sure your union continues to reflect the gospel. That takes a conscious and intentional effort on the parts of both the husband and the wife. The devil is not going to make it easy, but God makes it possible.

When we begin reading the book of Genesis, we see God creating heaven and earth. On earth, He created plant life, bodies of water, the sun, the beasts of the field, and even the first man. Notice this: all that time, there is no indication of satan’s presence. There is no mention of him rearing his menacing head to try and destroy what God had created up to that point. But from the moment Adam was given a wife, the devil made the destruction of marriage and family his mission.

When God brought Adam and Eve together, theirs was the first of countless wedding ceremonies that would bring two people together for what is designed to be a lifetime of loving one another and honoring Christ. God gave the new couple purpose and a mission, to be fruitful and multiply and to keep order on the earth.

Adam and Eve may have had totally different personalities and different gifts and callings, but their differences were not discordant—they were assets. They needed one another to complete the tasks given to them by God. In Eden, they were unified, two becoming one, as they unselfishly worked together, living out the beautiful portrait of love and harmony through worship of God alone.

God crafted Eve, the first woman, to be the life partner of Adam, the first man. It was a beautiful thing. Adam looked at his wife and exclaimed, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh…” (Genesis 1:23, NIV). In the very next verse of Scripture, we see, “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.”

In Ephesians 5:31, we discover those same words about marriage, but in verse 32 (English Standard Version), we are told that, “This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.”

The devil hated marriage then, and his loathing has not waned. It’s not so much that he doesn’t want a marriage to happen. He couldn’t care less if two unbelievers with no desire to please God get together—that, in no way, threatens his kingdom or his kingdom’s agenda. What he does not want, however, is for a bona fide Christian marriage—one that is truly founded on the Word of God—to happen. That shakes him to his core!

We have said it numerous times in this column, and there is no such thing as saying it too much. The relationship between a husband and wife, from the very beginning, was established and designed to demonstrate the connection between Jesus Christ and the church—pointing others to this imperative relationship. Adam and Eve’s marriage started out on track, but because they fell victim to the enemy’s lies and deceit, the harmony unraveled.

In Scripture, the body of believers here on earth is referred to as the bride of Christ. The holy divine truth displayed in this metaphor of marriage is that God destined there to be an enduring union between Jesus and HIS church.

1 Peter 2:5 states that you, (husband/wife) also, like living stones, are being built into a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, offering spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. Our earthly marriage as Christian couples captures a colorful portrait to the watching world of this godly design. God’s blueprint is for Christ and the church to become one. Galatians 3:28 (Amplified Version) There is [now no distinction regarding salvation] neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you [who believe] are all one in Christ Jesus [no one can claim a spiritual superiority].

So how does marriage reflect the gospel … we are glad you asked!

One of the ways in which a marriage reflects the gospel is that a husband and wife should love each other, even though they are imperfect, because God has shown this love to each of us. We, too, should be motivated by grace to love one another. That does not say that disagreements and problems won’t arise. Quite the opposite, in fact. Trouble and struggles will certainly happen in marriage, but as husbands and wives, our love for one another can’t be based on whether the season we’re going though in our covenant is a rainy one or one of sunshine.

You see, God’s love for us does not depend upon whether we are doing what pleases Him. He loved us even as sinners (Romans 5:8); therefore, even in the times that we do things that don’t line up with His Word, He still loves us. Is He pleased with our hardheadedness? Does he reward our disobedience with good things? Absolutely not. But He loves us still.

In marriage, there may be days we are not happy with our spouse for whatever reasons. There may be times they do something they shouldn’t or don’t do something that they should. Because of their actions, we may not be pleased with them all the time, but we still love them. Christ is the example of this great level of love, and He extends it toward us not only daily, but minute-by-minute and second-by-second. We don’t deserve His love, but gives it to us anyway.

There are a lot of ways to display God’s love but none more major than the cross of Christ. A Christian marriage must have at its core foundation the mandates of the gospel. Jesus Christ must be at its center. God must be at its head. The Bible teaches that love is to be expressed and reflected in our marriages identically to the way that Christ the (HUSBANDMAN) does do for HIS bride, the (CHURCH).

This Christian love then is a joyful sacrificial service of one another for God’s glory and each other’s good. This sacrifice is not self, but like the gospel, it is for others. This is, most notably, our spouse.

If you are a Christian, then let this respect of Christian marriage serve as a reminder of the gospel’s role in your unique and beautiful picture. Let your marriage be a display of God’s love for His bride, the church.

Drs. Michael & Kendra Holmes are the senior pastors of Deliverance Revival Church in Warner Robins, Ga., the founders of Royalty Relationship Coaching, LLC, the authors of the 31-day devotional, “Cross-Fire: Igniting Passionate, Purposeful, and Powerful Relationships” and guest hosts of the television talk show, “The Marriage Circle Connection.” W.A.R. is an acronym for “We Are Royalty,” ™ the official slogan of Royalty Relationship Coaching, LLC. Visit the website at www.RoyaltyRelationshipCoaching.com.

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