Hospitality … a diminishing gift?

If you could only see a

picture of this old house now … paint remover, sanding dust and furniture

everywhere it shouldn’t be. We’re in the midst of refinishing some 1932 model

hard wood floors that long ago were buried under carpet and linoleum. I

wouldn’t wish this job on anyone. In fact I can’t imagine anyone hiring

themselves out to hand scrape linoleum that’s been glued directly to a hardwood

floor.

Before we started I

consulted with Armstrong Linoleum®about how best to do it. Their reply: “You may not be able to”! That kind of

sounded like a challenge and in the midst of everything I often wondered if

they were right.

And yet, surrounded by this

chaos and buried in dust, my wife is planning to host a birthday party next

weekend for her soon-to-be 93-year-old step father. Who would ever do such a

thing and why? My wife would, and it’s because she has the gift of hospitality.

She’s really in her element when it comes to hosting and feeding family and

friends in our home.

During the first few years

we were married I didn’t think much about it because my mom was the same way. I

grew up in a house filled with company. Sometimes it was planned but more often

than not, it was just “spur of the moment” as mom would say.

After awhile (don’t ask me

how long or you’ll know how dense I can sometimes be), I realized that this

kind of entertaining, I call it hospitality, is not normal; it’s a gift. And

it’s very special to be blessed to grow up and live with this gift. It’s also a

lot of work helping them get ready to “do their thing!”

I don’t know for sure,

because my senior memory tends to get in the way, but hospitality seems to be a

diminishing gift these days. I could be all wrong because I haven’t done any

research on it, and I don’t intend to, but it just seems like when we were kids

back in the ’50s there was more hospitality shared among family, friends and

neighbors.

Am I right, Betty Gandy?

(She’s my 80 something friend in New Jersey who also has the gift of

hospitably, and faithfully reads this column every week). Anyone who knows

“Aunt Betty” is familiar with her chocolate chip cookies that she loves to give

away.

If I’m right, what could be

the reason(s)? Here are a few that come to mind:

·      Back then, working spouses were the exception;

now the rule.

·      Back then, we had no AC so we had windows and

doors open and saw our neighbors a lot more.

·      Back then, neighborhoods were safe and kids

roamed freely with friends.

·      Back then, we had three wholesome TV channels

and none of the other sort.

·      Back then, Little League was just getting

started and moms and dads weren’t frantically running to a dozen other

extracurricular events.

·      Back then, I could go on a good bit longer

except for time and space but you get the idea.

 

Hospitality is a wonderful

gift. If you have it, but it’s gotten a bit dusty like our house, why not get

it out, invite some friends over for … any excuse will do … and enjoy their

company. But if you have the choice, wait til after your floors are done!

See you next week!

Bill

Milby, CSA, is a Certified Senior Advisor and a Director of Visiting Angels® of

Macon, a non-medical, living assistance service for seniors.  If you have questions or comments about

this column you can reach him at william.mercylink@gmail.comor search for us at www.facebook.com/VisitingAngelsMacon