Communicating, fading memory, fishy tale

The story is told of a woman who telephoned a friend and asked, “How are you, dear?” “Simply awful,” came the reply. “My migraine headache has returned, my feet are killing me, my back is almost breaking in two, the ironing is piled to the ceiling, the house is a mess and the children are driving me out of my mind.”

“Now you listen to me,” said the woman on the other end of the line. “You just go lie down and rest. I’ll be right over and cook lunch for you and the children, get your ironing done, whisk up the house a bit, and watch the children while you get a bit of sleep. By the way, how is John?”

“John?” queried the complaining housewife. “Yes, John,” said the caller, “John, your husband.” “My husband’s name isn’t John,” said the housewife. “My gosh,” gasped the caller, “I must have the wrong number.”

There was a long stunned silence on the line until the housewife finally said, “You are not going to come over, are you?”

The moral of the above story is that before we start making promises we need to know for sure who we are communicating with.

An airline flight attendant tells the story about a lady with a small boy and girl who flew once on one of her flights. Shortly before lunch was to be served, the lady and her children visited the toilets in the rear of the plane’s cabin. The lady sent the little boy into one of the restrooms and accompanied the little girl into the other restroom.

The little boy finished his work, left the toilet, and headed back to his seat. An elderly gentleman, who had been waiting, went into the restroom the little boy had vacated.

In a moment or so, the woman and the little girl came out of the other toilet. The woman, thinking the little boy was still engaged, rapped sharply on the door across the aisle and said, “When you are finished, don’t forget to zip up your pants.”

In a few minutes, the elderly man came out of the restroom, stopped by the flight attendant and said, “Thanks, Miss. When you get old, you forget sometimes, and it is nice of the airline to have you girls remind us.”

The moral of the above story would have to be that before you rap on restroom doors, make doggone sure you know who’s in there.

And finally there is the story of two brothers who fished together all the time. One of the brothers always caught fish while the other never did. One weekend, they planned a big fishing trip, but at the last minute, the fish-catching brother became ill and stayed home. But he encouraged his brother, “Take my bait, my tackle and my boat, and go catch some fish.”

Needless to say, the other brother was thrilled. He rose the next day at the crack of dawn and went to the lake. “Boy,” he said to himself, “I am really going to catch some fish today using my fish-catching brother’s bait and tackle.”

He fished with his brother’s rod and reel, used his brother’s bait, even sat in his brother’s chair in the boat. Alas, after three hours he did not even have so much as one little nibble to show for his efforts. Then suddenly, the waters of the lake parted and a huge fish stuck up its head. “Where’s your brother?” the fish asked.

Don’t really know the moral of this story. If you do, please advise me.

Thought for the day: If you don’t want to be there on the takeoff, you won’t be there on the landing.

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